More than half of our participants (at 58.3%) believed that there were way too many nominees for Best Picture this year.  Some of you (at 25%), believed that the Academy should split the best film nominations into two categories, similar to the Golden Globes.  There were also readers who felt that 10 was way too many, period (at 16.7%).  No one thought that the 10 nominations was a way to give some non-indie films a chance at a win. 

What do you think of these results?  Do you agree?

Prospere Magazine webitor-in-chief, Cynthia Cheng believes that so far, none of the major mayoralty candidates are giving off a vibe that they believe the city needs to be better polished.  Maybe they just aren’t interested in being sophisticated?

Estée Lauder is hosting a series of social networking related events across the country, with the most recent one held in Toronto at the Holt Renfrew store on Bloor Street.  Participants get a complete make-over by a make-up artist, and then a professional photographer will take their picture for uploading on social networking sites like Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter.  When we I was there this past Friday, the event was packed.  I was booked in for 3:30 pm, but had to wait for 10 minutes before an artist was able to see me.  The shoot afterwards was very quick – only two poses were taken by the photographer.  The image wasn’t ready for upload immediately – they Photoshop it for you before emailing it a day later.  You could also have a hardcopy of the image should you choose to.  That picture is available the same day (strange – they should allow you to upload the picture yourself.  The hardcopy looked edited, which means that the file should be ready).

Though the event at Holt Renfrew has now ended, Estée has plans to be in other stores in a various parts of Canada in the spring, including Calgary, Ottawa, Vancouver and Montreal.  There will also be a return to several department stores in Toronto.  Chatelaine magazine has a list of event dates, so be sure to check them out.

Abby Z. is a designer who creates pieces for all shapes and sizes.  Launched in 2004 and ranging from size 2 to 24, Abby’s line targets women who want to be stylish and trendy, but not over-the-top.  In addition, unlike many other lines which carry plus-sized clothing, it does not have a “grandma” feel (a vibe that many non-standard size lines have, whether it be plus, petite or petite-plus) and appeals to young women.   In addition to being a designer, Abby is also a stylist and has dressed celebrities like Rosario Dawson and plus-petite actress, Nikki Blansky.

Lately, there has been a lot of talk about plus-sized, focusing especially on model Crystal Renn, who after spending some time as a “standard size” model, decided to gain weight and to enter the plus size market.  “Crystal is a gorgeous girl and her attention by media is helping other women realize that it’s the ‘inside you’ who has to be happy.”  When it comes to skinny celebrities, Abby feels that the media only pick on those who have the “bobble head” look – one reason why tiny actresses like Reese Witherspoon and Eva Longoria, despite being very small, are rarely criticized.  Abby also believes that true fashionistas do not look at numbers, but rather, the style.  

Abby Z. is available at department stores like Saks and Nordstrom.  She will also be making an appearance on the Home Shopping Network in the United States on February 9 at the following times (all EST): 1 am, 9 am and 6 pm.

The Olive Branch for Children, Deborah McCracken’s organization which helps people and communities in Tanzania affected by HIV/AIDS, will be holding two fundraising events this month.  The first, a small cocktail event in Yorkville, will be held this February 11 at the Empire Restaurant and Lounge on Cumberland and Bay from 7 pm to 9 pm.  The event, which is in its second year, not only supports the organization (operational costs, medical costs, etc…), but will also acquaint downtowners with the Olive Branch.  Also, the cocktail evening is serving as a pre-event to the gala, to be held two weeks later.  Tickets for the cocktail event will be available at the door for $50.

Deborah McCracken (top right) with some kids from the Olive Branch for Children

The gala started five years ago with 120 people in attendance.  Since then, it has more than tripled, with nearly 400 guests for the 2009 event.  Deborah and her organizers are hoping to break the record at this year’s February 26 event.  The event, which will be at Bellevue Manor in Vaughan, consists of a five course, sit-down dinner with entertainment, a silent auction, speeches, updates and more, for a cost of $100, a very decent price compared to similar events in the 416.  Attendees will receive a $40 tax receipt.  In general, 98% of funds netted go directly to the organization.

The Olive Branch for Children has touched the lives of more than 60,000 people in Tanzania.  Donations have come from all over, including $7,000 from the U.S. Ambassador to Tanzania.  Currently, the Olive Branch for Children has a partnership with Toronto’s Hospital for Sick Children.  For more information on the Olive Branch for Children, including details on how to get tickets for the gala, please visit www.theolivebranchforchildren.org.

Statistic Canada (Statscan) defines “mother tongue” as “first language learned at home.”  But is it accurate? Or, are they trying to inflate the number of Canadians who speak a non-official (English or French) language?  Why am I asking this?  Because plenty of people who learned an ancestral language prior to starting school grow up not speaking it well.  Most retain understanding, but the default language they think in is an official one.  To get a more accurate view, Statscan must redefine the question to better reflect the truth.

It’s interesting that the current question includes people who spoke an ancestral language as young children, but have sinced lost proficiency – the official definition describes “mother tongue” as the language spoken at home most often prior to the start of school (but doesn’t include anything about languages spoken AFTER school starts.  There are plenty of people who speak English to their family, even if the famiy members speak the ancestral language back.  What about them?) This very same government will never consider someone who is only semi-proficient in one of the official languages, while a “native speaker” of the other, bilingual.  It seems to me that the government wants the country to look as linguistically diverse as possible.  Of course, there could be other reasons.

It is very likely (maybe even obvious) that people who come up with these questions are either multi-generation Canadians who only speak one or both official languages or new Canadians looking to increase their linguistic presense in the country.  This makes it very difficult for people who still have ancestral ties, yet are not proficient in the language or languages to decide what to put.  Technically, neither English nor French is their mother tongue, since they learned something else prior to the start of school.  However, if the individual is more comfortable speaking an official language or has, perhaps lost spoken proficiency, can they still consider it a mother tongue?  Why doesn’t Statscan further ask people what language they’re most comfortable speaking?  Don’t they want an accurate picture? 

2011 is a census year in Canada, so there may still be some time for Statscan to make changes.  It’s better for the country and better for people to understand immigration patterns and integration rates if results are more accurate.

Being a good friend means being an empathetic ear.  Coincidentally, expert and active listeners also make excellent spouses, managers, employees, and relatives.  People that listen well are easy to talk to and put the speaker at ease, making exchanges simpler and more effective.

Listening is a valuable skill we are expected to develop in our youth. It enables us to process and decipher the information we receive and decide what to retain and how to respond.  It is about paying attention and participating, which are the foundation of conversation and good correspondence – or communication – with others.

Good communication is important to relationships.  Having verbal interaction with others is an integral part of what we do as humans.  In our professional lives, we are perpetually transferring information and acting on verbal instructions from others.  Socially, we share personal thoughts and ideas as a way of enthusiastically participating in the lives of our friends and family members.  Being a proficient listener is vital to our growth as individuals  within our unique existence as well as in the world as a whole.  Unfortunately, many of us seem to have forgotten how to effectively listen or carry on a polite and respectful conversation.

Webster’s New World Dictionary defines listening as making a conscious effort to hear.  Actively hearing something being said by another is a way of giving respect to that person and what they are saying.  Although some information, perhaps that of a technical nature, may be harder to understand and process, much of listening is about treating the other person how you would like to be treated and making them feel as though what they have to say is important and they are entitled to say it. 

Having a conversation is not just about waiting for your turn to speak.  A good listener concentrates on what the speaker is saying and takes in the details without immediately focusing on how the content of the dialogue will affect them.  We often listen to a person and assume they are telling us something because their information will impact us in some way.  Alternately, we may guess they are complaining or asking our advice or opinion when that may not be the case.  People wear many hats.  Sometimes, we’re story tellers.  Other times, we may just need to get something off our chest or look to have a chat to take a break from something we’re deeply involved in, but you won’t know what the case is unless you listen.  Interrupting and constantly asking questions is rude and may make the speaker feel as though you want them to race to the point or that you are only interested in the facts and how they relate to you. 

Steps to becoming an adept listener:

Give the speaker your undivided attention.  If that’s not possible, let them know. 

Often times, we are not physically or mentally prepared to take direction or deal with a specific issue.

Giving someone the “heads up” that you are indisposed will give them the option to condense their monologue to include only the most pressing details, or to get back to you then you can give them your full focus.

When you’re ready, stop what you’re doing and face the narrator.  This not only shows you’re listening, but allows you to pick up on non-verbal cues and lets the talker gauge your reactions as well.

Pay attention to the tone of the speaker’s voice and observe their body language.  A panicked tone will tell you something is wrong or if a situation is urgent.  Intonation will indicate if they’re asking for action or answers on your part.  Pauses will give you a clue as to when to reply.  Disclaimers such as “You’ll never believe this story” or “tell me what you think of this” may give you clues about how or weather to respond. 

Take notes.  Perhaps more necessary at work when instructions are being given than during a dinner with friends, jotting down a few notes can help to ensure you remember which clients a new campaign is targeting or what to bring for Sunday dinner.  Reading over your notes later may remind you of questions you hadn’t thought of asking at the time, points the person hadn’t included, or perhaps a fresh perspective to help resolve your friend’s predicament.

Hear them out.  Wait until the person has finished what they set out to tell you.  Most stories will have a specific beginning, middle, and end although sometimes which part is which may not become apparent until the entire tale has been told.  If anything is still unclear at that point, it is then appropriate to ask for more details or pose any lingering questions.

Clarify.  Now is the time to make inquiries or repeat details back to the person to be sure you have understood what’s been said.  If the speaker is asking for advice or suggestions, you now have sufficient information to work out an answer, combining that with your own personal expertise and experiences. 

Following these steps will make any speaker appreciate your time and respect and look forward to your feedback. In return, you can feel good that this person has come to you for your keen ear and good advice.

So listen up.  You might just learn something.

Image © Brad Killer/iStockphoto